Migraine anyone?

So, I think I have finally figured out why our kids like to bang their heads against the walls. They are trying ever so cleverly to self induce a migraine so they can see if the migraine in fact really warrants all the drama that we (the parents who get them) say it does.

Well, kids, since I can see you have not successfully self induced a migraine yet (since you are still moving, functioning, and making a lot of noise), let me help you get the idea.

One-Imagine your head is a tire. Say it is supposed to be inflated to 30 psi normally, well, go ahead and inflate it to 40 psi instead. That ought to give you a nice head start as to how this will feel.

Two-Get a bunch of big rocks. Imagine someone is picking them up and throwing them at your head, from about an inch away.

Three-Close your eyes as tight as you can. See how dark that is? Well, guess what, not dark enough.

Four-Imagine your head (but no other part of your body) is about 20 degrees higher in temperature than it should be.

And five- In your best four year old high pitched scream, yell loudly over and over again so that your ears ring and your head nears explosion.

Your head is throbbing, sweating, and you generally want to crawl into a cave and hibernate in complete and utter silence and darkness.

OK, now that I have created a good picture, I hope that will clear some things up for you.

I used to get migraines a lot when I lived in Texas and, let me note, I do not find this coincidental. In any event, my initial drug of choice was a bag of M+M's and a can of cold coke while lying on a cold floor in complete darkness. Sounds fun, huh? It used to work. But when that trick stopped working, I actually went to a doctor and got a prescription for a little magic pill that would dull the migraines when I got them.

When I moved back to New England, my migraines pretty much stopped. Not a coincidence. Anyway, for the first time in years, I am now the lucky winner of what is going on a 3 day migraine. It is unbearable. I have taken drugs, drank caffeine, taken to my bed in complete darkness, and nothing is touching it.

Please, oh gods of migraine healing, please come and taketh this away. I am begging you....